I believe most humans are resistant to change. We like things to stay comfortable. We like things to stay the same because it’s what we know. And, as cliche as it might sound, the one thing that is always constant in life is change. And as hard as we think change might be, we wouldn’t really like things to stay the same for the rest of our lives because that would be boring.
I recently had a conversation with a friend that I ran into at the grocery store. I hadn’t seen this person in a long time. We chatted about our families, and then this friend said that they and their spouse were really struggling with the fact that their youngest child is only a year from leaving the nest. He said that he and his wife did not feel prepared for it and were dreading it. There was definitely a part of me that could totally empathize with that because Dave and I recently became empty nesters the summer of 2020. I shared with him how each new chapter of life can feel a little unsettling because it’s something new but it can also be something very exciting.
No matter what this new chapter of life looks for you: empty nester, newly married, going off to college, recently divorced, starting a new business, or something else, — you get to decide what you want to think about it, however, I suggest that first of all, you look back on your previous chapter through the lens of gratitude. What did you learn about yourself that you can take with you in this new chapter? What are good habits that have worked for you and what are some bad habits that you want to change and leave behind? Identify the things that you did that might not be working for you any longer.
As a life coach I work with women that are looking for more purpose and meaning in their life. They feel paralyzed in knowing how to do anything else with their life because they have been doing the same thing for so long they don’t know any other way. A new chapter of life feels super scary to them and it feels like walking into the deep, dark unknown. It doesn’t have to feel this way if we work on changing our perspective to curiosity or excitement instead of feeling dread or scared. Perspective has everything to do with how we CHOOSE to THINK about any given circumstance in our life.
In my coaching practice I teach that the circumstances of our lives are always neutral until we attach a thought to it. Our thoughts create an emotion/feeling. Our emotions/feelings are the driver and they dictate how we show up – basically, they dictate our actions. Our actions gives us a result. We are always getting a result that we either like or don’t like.
New chapters and new beginnings are exciting! Think about this like you’re writing a new chapter in the book of your life. What do you want that to look like? Think and dream of all the possibilities.
I’ll leave you with this, “sometimes change is chosen for us and sometimes we choose change.” I say embrace it all. 🙂